Unreality?***?

by the looks of this it happens to alot of people. i get a very strange feeling sometimes every since i was little like i set apart. its very hard to explain. its like looking straight into your soul its so powerful that you get lost in it. it gives me a kind of peace sort of. its very brief for me tho. its like i start imagining i could have never existed. and i get the feeling somethings gonna happen to me sometimes. but for me its more like stepping off the street and feeling like a car is about to hit you. that i am about to be thrown across the pavement have shattered bones and blood everywhere. i tend to be very aware of death. usually more of my death and sometimes those very close to me but when i think of others its a very sad experience when i think of my mother dying i cry because i know it would change my whole life.